Eliminating Loneliness

What's sad, as Seth Godin recently said in a post, is that lonely people join organizations. The sad part is that they join, but don't realize the necessity of participation.

10 Rules for Connecting

1. I cannot just be a name on a list.

2. I must believe in the works and mission of the group.

3. I must schedule a meeting with an officer or executive of the group, to find out how to best get involved.

4. I must join an active committee.

5. I must attend all or most of the meetings and events of the organization.

6. I must financially support the club with more than just my membership dues. I will need to budget that much more into my marketing budget.

7. I must budget time into my schedule so that I am not stressed by having to attend functions.

8. I must figure out how I can give back to the organization.

9. If appropriate, I must invite and financially underwrite guests to each meeting and event.

10. I must take on a leadership persona, helping the group to prosper.

You'll notice that the above ten rules are NOT about you and how you can be less lonely. It's all about making the group more successful. Doing so will eliminate your loneliness as a side benefit.

A Team Approach

I hate cleaning the refrigerator. But ever so often I just can't stand it another minute.

The need to clean is combined with the fact that our expensive Sub-Zero refrigerator, gets an ice dam in the bottom of it. Yes, it is 15 years old, but this has been an on-going problem right from the start. We never know that the ice-age is creeping in there unless melt water, that should be going down the frozen drain hole, suddenly is puddled in front of the refrig on the kitchen floor.

That's what happened this morning.

Doing both jobs is even more hateful. Using the hair dryer to melt the ice is a messy, time-consuming task.

So Steve and I teamed for this project. He took care of the glacier melt, and I cleared the science projects from the interior and then washed the shelves.

It didn't seem to take half the time it usually does. Working together made it bearable.

It's sort of an example of what two people can do when they work on prospecting together. Combining the effort makes more happen in a shorter time. Two people can thaw a chilly target more easily than each working separately.

Why don't we all do more of that????

Speaking

I have been speaking for many years. I have also been a Toastmaster for over a decade. But Guy Kawasaki's post today is enlightening. His friend, Doug Lawrence, wrote fifteen absolute necessities for speaking. Number 4 is amazing. I can't wait to try it.

Doug says to bite your tongue if your mouth gets dry.

As I get older, I do tend to get dry mouth when speaking. I'm sure others get it from nervousness. I cannot wait to try this technique. Just sitting here typing I tried it and it does seem that my mouth got more moisture as I gently bit my tongue.

Thanks, Guy, for bringing Doug to us.

women in kayaks

Yesterday afternoon, I gave my friend Cheryl a mini lesson in blogging.

Cheryl is a great friend, and she also takes care of my water garden, so that I can enjoy it when I sit out on the front porch.

Cheryl has also launched a new business, Adventures for Women at the Water's Edge. She will help women get out there kayaking, hiking, biking, swimming and just communing with nature.

One of Cheryl's favorite pursuits is kayaking. Her own first experience left something to be desired. Her teachers were men. They fitted her incorrectly for the kayak "skirt" which meant when she rolled over and was upside down in the water, she was not able to easily escape. She doesn't want that to happen for other women.

She has three trips planned for this year. If you are a women who wants to be guided by someone who cares about your outdoor experience contact Cheryl. She doesn't have a website just yet, so the best way is to email her at cherylmccormick@gmail.com.

kayaking....try it now!

What unfortunate experience have you had because "experts" gave you bad advice?

Can I Talk Aussie?

Yes, our world has shrunk.

Who would think that today I can communicate with someone in Australia, asking for their help, and expect to receive a reply within a couple hours or at the most a day.

Here's why I sent that email out. One of my BNI friends and also Certified Networker student is an Arbonne International representative. She is heading to Australia at the end of this month to help launch Arbonne in that country.

She would like to connect with BNI members in Australia to develop relationships for two reasons.

Of course, the first reason is that she would love to receive referrals of people who might be interested in this new business opportunity.

But even more important, she wants to have connections with BNI members, so she can refer her new Australian business partners to BNI. She knows the value of structured, word-of-mouth marketing.

In the Certified Networker program, one small piece of information that we talk about is the referral food chain. Those people who get business when your business gets busier know that if they get out in front of you, "feeding" you new business, that in the end they will win more business too.

That's exactly what Kim is proposing to do. As she gets Arbonne representatives, BNI Australia will get more members. With BNI members helping Kim to meet people, that's what will happen.

What global networking have you been involved?

Quiet Visitors

This morning hubby, Steve, was leaving the house before me. Of course, the dogs went out the back door with him. Seconds later he was shouting, "Debby, quick, look out the window at the deer."

The dogs were at the invisible fence line, barking up a storm at the four deer that had been right at our property line. Now, I have to tell you that of the three dogs, two are really not very smart.

Our dogs are hunting dog breeds, Springer Spaniels and a Yellow Lab. They are not the best hunters, though, as they are frightened of guns. Makes me laugh.

This morning they probably just wanted to play with the BIG DOGS.

Of course by the time I looked, the deer were farther north, figuring the better part of valor was not to stick around for the dogs.

But it made me think about how sales people scare away prospects, going after the prospect in full force, instead of being quiet and letting the prospect lead the way. It is especially so at networking events, where sales people mistakenly think that it is the time to sell.

Where and when have you seen prospects scared away by networking dogs?

Which Book Shall I Take?

This week I'm heading out for the annual national BNI conference. I'm flying east to Bethesda, so at least I don't have the time change to deal with!

The flight is only two hours, so I need to decide which book to take that will keep me busy for those two hours.

I am not a bad plane traveler, but I am antsy. If I can loose myself in a book, my seatmates will be happier.

Should I take Seth Godin's "The Dip" which I am about halfway through? But that book takes some thought. I probably won't get "lost reading it.

Should I take Scott Ginsberg's newest book, "Make a Name for Yourself?" Again I am halfway through and I have to stop and think as I read.

Should I take something else??????

I am in the middle of some dumb mind candy book -- fiction. Six women -- been together since college -- basically a soap opera. But would I be embarrassed to be seen reading this book????

Should I take "The Glass Castle." I got tired of being on the waiting list at the library and bought a copy at K-Mart yesterday. But that would mean that I am reading four books at one time.

What should I do?????