It's a Poopy Day

Update #2

My friend Marcia, has been going through treatment for Ovarian Cancer. You can read one of the posts about it here.

While the journey has not been easy, Marcia has kept her perspective about her and has also kept her sense of humor.

After surgery in September to remove the cancerous tumors, she was having to manage a colostomy bag - albeit a temporary one, but in the moment that doesn't matter. Of all the medical issues she has had to deal with, this challenged her the most. But she got through it. And November 5 was a red letter day because the colostomy was reversed.

And in a conversation I had with Marcia on Friday, she was proud to report that, "Yes, she had already had a poopy day!" In fact, she had done the poopy dance.

Now, I ask ya', can that comment do anything but make ya' smile?

Even better are the test markers. At her caringbridge website she reports,

"At present the only marker to diagnose Ovarian Cancer is the blood test called CA125. For women who don't have cancer the average number is 35. Last Tuesday my number was 42!! The doc's will keep going with the chemo for 4 or 5 more cycles but I think the numbers tell an awesome story. (note: Marcia'a had been up over 4000 at one time.)

Words cannot express how grateful we are for your love and concern. Keep the positive energy flowing and the prayers ascending, and do the same for all you know who are dealing with this dreaded disease."

I am so proud of my friend, Marcia. She has been a mentor all my life and with this chapter in our lives, she continues to show the way.

Thanks, Marcia!

Update #1

It's update time.

Back in March of this year I wrote about my friend Mary Simmons' brother in this post. The basic concept was that because of my relationship with Mary I wanted to help publicize her sister-in-law's effort to raise money for Mary's brother's alternative treatment for his prostate cancer. This was treatment that insurance would not cover.

Last week Mary and I took some time to have coffee. Just so you know, enough money was gathered to send her brother to California for treatment. While no lifespan is ever guaranteed, her bro with be at Thanksgiving this year feeling pretty good.

Mary forwarded me an email that her sister-in-law, Gina, sent to her while they were in California.

"The doctors were thrilled with George's progress here, and believe that his journey to healing will be very successful. We are encouraged and optimistic!! It feels amazing to have this kind of support and encouragement in the midst of what has often felt like a very scary situation. He has a take-home regime of supplements and diet- all very manageable- along with the ongoing expertise and watchcare of the doctors here. We definitely don't feel alone on this path."

As we begin to roll through the month of November, I am thankful for all the friends I have and how full they make my life. The relationships add depth to my life experience. Mary's story is just one example of how that happens!

Can You Belive?

In the Certified Networker course we use three letters, V-C-P, to have a way to describe the level of relationship. V is visibility, C is credibility and P is profitability.

With that being said, you also need to know that Steve and I live out in the country on 13 acres of what we like to call prairie, but what others would call a big farm field! The hawks are fun to watch out here as they soar over the field looking for a little "lite" lunch. Sometimes one will sit right outside our bathroom window, a foot or two away from the bird feeder, waiting for a little fast food!

Last night the two Springers (that is a picture of Owen looking particularly smart.) were out being dumb as usual. We could see them across the pond circling and pouncing on something. Steve went out to investigate and no, it was not a snake, nor was it a cat from the barns across the road.

No, it was a hawk. And it had an injured leg or maybe a wing, or maybe both. Steve rescued it and brought it in. It is pretty interesting up close. He did call Nature's Nursery, the wildlife rescue organization, but as far as I know they have not yet called back. So the hawk has taken up residence in the barn.

Back to V-C-P. With all the hawks, I think they are magnificent, but my relationship has always been one of very early visibility. They would fly away immediately when I came close. To keep this wonderful (I know, I know, they are not nice birds, but they are still beautiful.) bird, wild; we will try not to imprint on it. But wow, I do love being at just a little higher level of visibility so that I can see it up closer than ever before.

With most humans I want my relationships to develop to high credibility and hopefully, profitability with some. But I am happy with keeping this connection at a low level relationship, because that's what's best.

So what interesting happened on your Sunday afternoon?

Shared Dining

Last night Steve and I went to dinner at one of our favorite new restaurants -- La Scola. We happen to know the owners but that's not what this is about.

Our food was tasty -- but that's not what this is about.

The ambiance was warm and inviting -- but that's not what this is about.


The service was impeccable -- but that's not what this is about.

What this is about is the tone of the restaurant.

Cheryl and Gus Nicolaidis have created such a friendly atmosphere that what happened to us last night probably happens all the time to others.

We were seated at a table along the wall banquette. There was another couple at the table next to us. The tables are far enough away to provide privacy, if wanted, but yet close enough to encourage conversation.

And that's exactly what happened when the appetizer arrived at our table. The guy next store asked what it was. Knowing that Steve and I could not eat the whole appetizer (nor did we need it) we offered some of it to him. At first he politely refused, but we wore him down. We ended up chatting through both of our dinners. In the small world we live in today, the women's son lives quite near us, and she has a small farm for sale within a couple miles of us. We will probably never see them again, but it was fun to add a dimension to our dining experience that we had not expected.

And that's what this is about.

Cheryl and Gus has created a wonderful restaurant where not only is the food yummy, service great and the place beautiful, but because of their friendliness, they have set the tone for their patrons to be friendly, too.

They understand clearly that relationship is a factor in the success of a restaurant.

What wonderful dining experiences have you had and what made them so special?

Stupidity vs. the Liar

This past weekend the mayor of Toledo, Carty "the mouth" Finkbeiner again made Toledo look really stupid. You see the marines from Grand Rapids, MI, had planned an urban exercise for the weekend in Toledo. They had all their advance permissions to do this, as they have done before. Or so they thought. As they were arriving, a representative of the mayor met their first bus and basically told them that the welcome mat had been withdrawn. You can read about this here.

But I guess we have to put stupidity in relation to lying and cheating. Here's why.

On the 27th of January when we were in the Detroit airport, waiting for our flight to Costa Rica, the big story was that the mayor of Detroit, Kwame Kilpatrick, had lied under oath about whether he had an intimate relationship with a top aide. This was during a whistle blower trial a couple years ago where two police officers were saying that they were fired because of their investigation of his security detail having covered up such a relationship. The case was settled out of court and cost the city 8.2 million dollars, paid for by tax dollars. Detroit, like any major city is cash-strapped at best.

Fast forward to now. The Detroit Free Press got their hands on some records of text messages that Kwame and his aide sent to each other on city-owned phones. The graphic messages left nothing to be imagined. It was obvious that there had been an intimate relationship. Kilpatrick's studly response is, "No, I'm not going to resign. After all, I'm a guy, I'm a dude, I'm a man, I'm a person, I've got a wife and children. There are things I don't want out on the street."

So there you have it folks. You have to put it in perspective.

Carty = stupid
Kwame = cheat
Carty = $10,000 loss to the Marines for expenses
Kwame = $8.6 million loss to the citizens of Detroit

This in no way lets Carty off the hook. Please Carty, get someone to talk for you and stop making us look stupid. I don't care if you want to personally look like you didn't get past second grade, but I am tired of getting swept into your little forays.

But this is not the end of this whole story.

You see, buried in the Detroit article about good ole' boy Kwame, is the fact that his aide resigned the day after this all hit the papers. Yep, you got it.

The woman took the fall.

For that I am livid. Kwame struts around like a little Banty rooster, while the woman slinks off to lick her wounds.

What's wrong with this picture?

New Sales Manager Tips #1

As promised, I am going to share my first ever article published in Selling Power Magazine. (I think it was actually entitled Personal Selling Power Magazine in those days, around 1994.)

So here we go;

Being named sales manager to an existing sales team means that you must immediately be ready to lead in order to gain the trust and support of your team members. Listed below are nine concepts to accelerate that leadership process. (I listed three in this post today and will do the same tomorrow and the next.)

1. Know their names. Memorize the names of your team members in advance of your first day. Also learn names of all other staff members, because you will seem to fit in and consequently people will feel comfortable with you, which is the first step in gaining trust.

2. Have a flexible plan. Your team members will expect direction from you, even the experienced ones will appreciate knowing what your plans are.

3. Schedule regular sales meetings. Besides the usual information, allow time for recognition and education. "World's Records" permits each sales person to brag about a significant happening in his life, either business or personal. ("The baby slept through the night," or "I finally got the Smith account.") Also, have everyone tell what they learned in the past week. It allows each team member to help train because probably the others need to know that piece of information, too.

When you think about the above three tips, they are all about developing relationships quickly, so that the team members feel they can trust the new guy (or gal.)

Tune in for three more tips tomorrow.

Do you have any stories about sales managers you've had in your career?

Tenth Anniversary Celebration

Yesterday, September 15, was my friend, Sandy Pirwitz's
10th Anniversary of her store, Sandy's Stuff for Women. I am very proud of her. She was a nurse, and a very well-known one, for 30 years. In fact, if you google Sandy Pirwitz, the sixth entry down is an article in the Journal of Infection Control where she is listed as a major author.

She had a huge sale to celebrate the anniversary, giving back to her customers in a big way. I stopped by to take a card, take a picture and just to lend support. I left my purse in the car, never having an inkling that I would spend any money.

I should know better. Let me tell you about the bargains I got.

1. A dark brown, medium-wale corduroy pants suit, labeled from Casual Corner for $29. I'll need to have the pants altered, but no matter, that's a deal.

2. A cream and brown tweed jacket, that zips up the front. Another steal for $17.

3. A cream-colored with brown trim, cotton and spandex sweater set for $14.

4. A necklace and earrings with fall colors and leaves for $16.

And on top of that everything that I purchased was 20% off.

Sandy had a goal of hitting the $2000 mark in sales yesterday. I hope she hit it. My deals were so good, that I feel like I robbed her of reaching that mark.

Oh yeah, you'd think that the only thing she'd want to do last night was to go home a put her feet up. No, not Sandy. She's involved with a play called the Birth Project that was presented last night in Maumee. This play had a "talkback" session after the play with two local doctors. Sandy helped the producer to connect with these doctors and in that vein, she'll be there supporting those docs and giving to the community because that's what Sandy's all about.

Thanks, Sandy for all you do. Happy Anniversary.

ed. note: 9/16/07 Sandy reported that not only did she hit her goal, an all time high, but she went over by 20%. Bravo!

Connection Surprises

Certainly one of the many memorable points of my vacation, was a visit to the Phipps Conservatory in Pittsburgh. This is a wonderland for plant and flower lovers. That's me!

Deanna and Bob Schmitt, my BNI connection in Pittsburgh, are also my out-of-the-box, experiences, friends. Whenever I visit, Deanna always has something surprising planned for us to do.

We had visited the Phipps in a previous trip and of course I was enthralled. But this time it was amazing. You see, the renowned artist, Dale Chihuly, has an exhibit of his wonderfully bright, sparkly and unbelievably creative glass work, spaced among the plants. I can't find words to describe the experience, other than, if you are in the Pittsburgh area, drop everything and visit this exhibit. You won't be sorry.

Which takes me back to connections. The relationships I build are always full of surprises. Deanna is one of my very best friends. Our friendship spans close to twenty years. She is the one I go to with business questions related to networking. We produce a podcast together called Networking on the Chin. We rely on each other for all kinds of things. But the best part of the friendship is what I call my cultural wing. She stretches and forces me to use it to fly.

What friend helps to round out your life in ways different than you expected when you first met them?

Making the Call

I track my networking efforts each week with a tool from the Certified Networker training program. It gives points for certain task that I do.

Now, believe me, in the past when I ran into one of those old-fashioned, sales point systems, I RAN!

They never seemed to take into account the personality or the abilities of the individual.

Instead the sales manager would say, "Okay, from this point on we're all going to accumulate 50 points per week and of those 10 will come from cold calling, 10 from phone calling, 20 from appointments and 10 from mailers."

I hate authority that is mindless. The above system would have me rebelling in three seconds. But that's a whole 'nuther story!

Back to the points I track. I like this system, because no one tells me what to do. I choose where I get my points and how I accumulate them. I also choose how many points I need to accumulate.

The most challenging area for me to gain points should be the easiest. Calling someone in my network of friends and acquaintances is where I always fall short. I have tried to analyze my reticence and think I have picked up on a few answers.

It takes time to have a conversation. But then I love meeting with people in person.

It's more impersonal. But phone conversations can be more confidential than those in person.

I think I'm bothering people. But they wouldn't answer their phone if they didn't want to be bothered.

They'll think I'm calling to sell to them. But I don't do that in person.

What is it?????? Why do I have this block??????


HELP!

Red-Headed Snackers

My hubby Steve put a couple of those suet wire cages out for the birds this winter. I had a ball watching all the birds, but I especially enjoyed the woodpeckers. The feeder that I can watch from my office window stayed filled till about two weeks ago. The big, red-headed woodpeckers (my friend, Deanna Tucci Schmitt would tell you the actual name of the bird.) were there a lot.

Once they licked (do birds lick?) the containers clean, they no longer appeared at my porch.

This weekend I put some more stuff in the cages.

But the woodpeckers must have moved on or found some other more desirable feeder.

Hmmm, it made me wonder if I'm paying attention my referral sources and feeding them well. Or am I allowing them to move on the more favorable relationships?

A Friend Moves On

I am sad.

Lynda is gone.

Let me tell you about my friend, Lynda Goodremont.

She made everyone feel special. She made me feel brilliant and wonderful when I was around her.

That was a reflection coming away from Lynda.

Goodbye, Lynda.

Nomination Series #2

So many people think that a nomination should be a big secret, that if and when the nominee wins, if should be a big surprise. Sort of like a surprise birthday party.

They couldn't be more wrong!

You see this is all about relationship development. The win is the icing on the cake. The nomination process is the cake.

Having the nominee aware and part of the writing of the application will help you to know that person that much better. Each time I have nominated someone, I find out all kinds of good stuff that I didn't know before about this person. You also get to tell your friend why you have selected them for nomination.

Think about it. How many chances do we have to tell our friend how much we admire them?

Who would you like to nominate for an award so that you can tell them how much they mean to you?